Top 4 Phrases to Avoid Saying to Your Anxious Child in 2025

There’s a crucial difference between a child who feels worried and one who experiences genuine anxiety—a condition that activates their nervous system and triggers intense emotional responses.

As a parent of a 9-year-old who struggles with anxiety, I’ve learned firsthand that well-meaning words can sometimes do more harm than good. If you have a child facing anxiety, here are four key phrases to avoid, along with better ways to respond compassionately and effectively.

1. “It’s not a big deal, don’t worry so much!”

When my son tearfully feared that his 5-year-old brother might run away after a tantrum, my instinct was to laugh—though I quickly stopped myself. The situation felt minor to me, but for my son, the fear was overwhelming and very real.

Instead of dismissing his feelings, acknowledge the depth of his fear. Try guiding him through slow, calm breathing exercises to help regulate his physical response. Then, share your own experiences of fear or anxiety to connect empathetically.

2. “There’s nothing to be scared about!”

My son once panicked about someone breaking into his upstairs bedroom. I tried to reassure him logically, explaining why it was unlikely. Unfortunately, this only increased his distress.

Recognize that anxiety triggers an internal alarm that isn’t always logical. Validate his feelings by acknowledging his fear and letting him know you’ve felt scared before. This helps him feel seen and less isolated.

3. “You’re such a worrier!”

Calling an anxious child a "worrier" can be damaging. It labels them negatively and may increase feelings of guilt or shame.

Instead, avoid labeling altogether. When your child is calm, consider exploring how anxiety works biologically together. Understanding that anxiety is a natural response can empower them and reduce stigma.

4. “Here are all the reasons you don’t have to worry.”

Listing logical reasons to dismiss your child’s fears often falls flat because anxiety is emotional, not rational.

Help your child visualize a safe, peaceful place and encourage slow breathing to calm their nervous system. Once relaxed, gently introduce the idea that feelings are not always facts, enabling them to challenge anxious thoughts over time.

Moving Forward

Initially, I struggled to comfort my anxious son because I didn’t understand the best approach. By focusing on addressing his physical state first, validating his emotions, and sharing my own experiences, I’ve seen significant improvement.

Q: How else can I support my anxious child?

Try identifying triggers by discussing what they’ve seen or heard. Limit exposure to adult content like movies, video games, or news. Encourage your child to express their fears and collaborate on strategies to manage them.

— Dr. Karen Gill

Note: This information is for educational purposes and does not replace professional medical advice.

Explore useful articles in Sexual Wellness as of 19-08-2016. The article titled " Top 4 Phrases to Avoid Saying to Your Anxious Child in 2025 " offers in-depth analysis and practical advice in the Sexual Wellness field. Each article is carefully crafted by experts to provide maximum value to readers.

The " Top 4 Phrases to Avoid Saying to Your Anxious Child in 2025 " article expands your knowledge in Sexual Wellness, keeps you informed about the latest developments, and helps you make well-informed decisions. Each article is based on unique content, ensuring originality and quality.