Key Phrases to Avoid on a First Date for a Great Impression

The first impression you make on a date is incredibly important. Often, it shapes how the relationship will develop. That's why steering clear of harsh or tactless remarks is essential.

A few years ago, global media shared an intriguing story about Australian producer and radio host Yana Hocking, who revealed a 'relationship-killing' phrase that can end things abruptly on a first date. She recounted going on a date with an attractive man, but their conversation quickly soured when he casually mentioned he had been arrested twice.

Curious, she asked for details. He explained he had once accidentally kidnapped someone while dressed in a special forces costume with a fake gun and a real knife after a costume party. When a stranger at a bus stop criticized his appearance, he grabbed the man by the neck and dragged him around the corner to retaliate. Yana chose not to share the details of his second arrest, calling it too intense for most listeners.

This experience made Yana reflect on whether some topics are better left for when you know someone better, rather than during initial conversations about interests and hobbies. Even with such honesty, the man could have made a better impression by understanding basic first date etiquette.

With that in mind, we’ve compiled a list of phrases to avoid during your nerve-wracking first meeting.

Keep Negativity to a Minimum

Fact: cheerful and kind-hearted people attract everyone! People admire them and want to be around them. Even if you're going through a tough time or battling depression, try to appear optimistic on this important evening. Psychologists say that smiling and laughter not only make you more attractive but also genuinely improve your mood.

A lighthearted and easygoing conversation will leave a positive impression and showcase your best qualities—happy people often come across as successful, pleasant, and life-loving.

“My Exes Were…”

Unfortunately, no one wants to hear about your past failed relationships on a first date—not even the successful ones. Avoid sharing painful breakups or lingering heartbreaks. Doing so can make your date doubt your readiness for a new relationship. Mentioning ex-partners early on suggests you might not be emotionally available.

Discussing past romances negatively can also raise red flags—your date might wonder if you’ll speak the same way about them if things don’t work out. It’s best to focus on more engaging topics and leave exes out of the conversation.

“I Want to Marry Someone Like You”

While this might sound romantic, declaring marriage intentions on a first date can be overwhelming and counterproductive. People often say such things without fully considering the impact. Your date may not even understand what you mean.

Talking about serious commitments and marriage is best reserved for when you’ve built a closer, more comfortable relationship.

“I’m So Annoyed By…”

Expressing emotions honestly is healthy, but avoid coming across as toxic or overly negative. Pay attention to how much you complain. Nobody enjoys spending time with a chronic complainer. It’s fine to share frustrations occasionally, but don’t immediately launch into rants about your coworkers, friends, boss, or neighbors.

“I Looked You Up Online”

It’s great to show interest by knowing your date’s hobbies or passions from social media, but don’t reveal that you’ve dug into their private life. This might make them feel uncomfortable and think you’re a stalker who will soon invade their privacy by checking their phone, messages, or social interactions.

“You’re Not One of Those ‘Weird’ People, Are You?”

Such questions, often aimed at vegetarians, childfree individuals, or members of alternative communities, can be off-putting and leave a negative impression. On a first date, aim to be open and nonjudgmental, keeping your personal beliefs to yourself initially. While shared values matter, early conversations should be light and easygoing.

Photo: Getty Images

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