Expert Tips to Protect Your Child from School Bullying

Psychologist Victoria Shimanskaya shares valuable insights on how to safeguard children from bullying in school environments.

Bullying, a longstanding and widespread issue, manifests as aggressive behavior among teenagers. While harsh treatment in schools has existed for ages, it now takes on new, more complex forms.

Videos depicting public humiliation often circulate online, and many remain indifferent until it hits close to home. How can you recognize if your child is experiencing bullying, and what steps can you take to prevent it?

Early warning signs that your child might be in distress include:

• Becoming withdrawn
• Increased nervousness
• Displaying aggression
• Reluctance to attend school

If you suspect bullying, the first step is to engage in an open and trusting conversation with your teenager. While some parents may be tempted to check their child's social media accounts without permission, the ethics of this approach are debatable.

In my professional experience, some cases of bullying only came to light after reviewing a child's messages. To respect personal boundaries, consider these guidelines:

• Allow your child the space to be imperfect during conversations;
• Connect with your child on social media to better understand their interests and challenges;
• If you request to see their messages, be prepared to share yours as well;
• Pay attention to whether your child has friends, as bullies often target those who are isolated;
• Consistently nurture your child's self-esteem and confidence.

Remember, if your teenager hesitates to seek your help, it indicates a gap in communication and support. It’s crucial that your child feels you are always on their side. This trusting relationship is the best defense and prevention against bullying!

Effective Ways to Respond to Bullying

In brief, bullies often seek a reaction. When they don’t get one, their interest usually fades. Teaching your child how to respond appropriately is key.

Encourage them to "ignore" the bully. This involves training their internal response to feel indifferent, as if thinking, "I'm bored." Help your child view bullies as insignificant objects like "a chair or a trash bin."

Develop a healthy self-image that remains unaffected by others’ opinions. The judgments of others act like a "distorted mirror" reflecting a false image. Your child should understand that no matter what others say, it doesn’t change who they truly are.

Mastering calm internal reactions is a major step toward self-protection — achieving this accounts for 70% of success.

Next, teach your child the "surprise" tactic—responding to bullying with unexpected kindness and politeness. For example, replying to aggression with compliments like, "I see you want to show you're confident. You are! And your outfit looks great." Such responses often disarm bullies and leave them confused.

Amid the hustle of daily life, maintaining open communication with your child is essential. Talk not only about daily matters but also about unrelated topics to gently guide their behavior without being overly authoritative. A trusting family atmosphere is vital for building strong connections and preventing negative situations before they arise.

Photo credit: Getty Images

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