2025 Guide: Why Situationship Breakups Hurt More Than Relationships + Emotional Recovery Tips
Discover why endings in situationships can be more painful than traditional breakups and learn effective strategies to find closure and heal from these complex connections.
Ending casual connections without clear commitments can sometimes cause deeper emotional pain than traditional relationships.
After ending a serious seven-year relationship, I dove into therapy and relocated from New York. Soon after, I found myself in a situationship—intensely attracted and emotionally invested despite its undefined nature. We shared long dates and exciting moments, but when he abruptly ended things to pursue someone else, I was left reeling. Surprisingly, the pain from this short-lived connection felt sharper than my long-term breakup.
This experience is common. Many on TikTok and beyond express how situationships can be harder to move past than established relationships. Let’s explore why these ambiguous connections leave such a lasting impact and how you can find closure.
Understanding the Key Differences: Relationship vs. Situationship
A traditional relationship involves clear commitment, exclusivity, open communication, and mutual investment in building trust and planning a shared future. This foundation provides emotional security and accountability.
Conversely, a situationship is an undefined, noncommittal connection without explicit expectations or long-term plans. You enjoy each other’s company but lack consistent communication or clarity about the relationship’s direction. The boundaries are blurry, leading to spontaneous, unpredictable interactions that can feel thrilling yet confusing.
While the honeymoon phase of a situationship can feel exhilarating and freeing, the lack of stability often results in emotional uncertainty and mixed signals.
Why Breaking Up from a Situationship Can Feel More Painful
Both relationship and situationship breakups are challenging, but situationships often end suddenly, catching you off guard. Unlike long-term relationships where problems build over time, situationships can dissolve quickly without warning, leaving you with unanswered questions and a sense of rejection.
- Unexpected Endings: Situationships rarely come with warning signs, making breakups feel abrupt and shocking.
- Lack of Closure: The undefined nature means you may not feel entitled to a proper breakup conversation, intensifying confusion and shame.
- Isolation: Friends and family might not fully understand the significance of the situationship, limiting your support network.
- Denial of Feelings: You might downplay your emotional investment, making it harder to grieve and process your feelings.
- Idealization: Limited knowledge about the other person can lead to idealizing them, complicating emotional recovery.
- Lingering Fantasies: The short, intense nature leaves many 'what-ifs' unresolved, fueling rumination and sadness.
How to Heal and Find Closure After a Situationship Ends
Regardless of the connection’s length or intensity, breakups impact your emotional health deeply. Research shows that breakups can increase vulnerability to depression and stress.
Prioritize self-care: seek support from loved ones, journal your feelings, allow yourself to cry, and consider therapy. Reflect on the experience, what you learned, and what you want moving forward.
Accepting the reality of your feelings allows you to fully grieve and begin healing. Remember, your emotions are valid, and taking time to process them is essential for moving on.
Final Thoughts
Situationships may be casual by definition, but their endings can still cause significant emotional pain. Denying your feelings only prolongs the healing process.
Embrace your emotions with compassion and curiosity. These experiences teach valuable lessons about your emotional needs and how you want to engage in future relationships.
By honoring your feelings and practicing self-kindness, you can navigate the complexities of situationship breakups and emerge stronger.
Written by Julie Nguyen, Certified Relationship Coach and Mental Health Writer
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