Avoid These Common Mistakes to Succeed on Dating Sites
Discover eight crucial mistakes to avoid on dating websites to improve your chances of finding a meaningful connection and keep your conversations engaging.
If you're serious about finding a meaningful relationship on a dating site, there are certain pitfalls you should steer clear of.
By Ekaterina Fadeeva
Evangelist of the social entertainment network “Fotostrana,” expert in dating and relationships.
On average, a dating site user takes about four months to either:
- find a partner and start a real-life relationship;
- give up and conclude that dating sites aren’t for them;
- decide to stay on the platform and spend a few more years there.
So how can you become one of the lucky ones who find their match? Try to avoid the common mistakes outlined below.
1. Choosing the Wrong Profile Photo
The saying "You’re judged by your appearance at first, but remembered for your mind" perfectly applies to selecting your profile picture. Consider the impression you want to make.
A successful man’s photo is often best portrayed in business attire rather than beachwear or shirtless. You’ll have time to reveal your physique later—don’t rush it.
The same advice applies to women: to avoid inappropriate comments or advances, refrain from posting pictures in swimsuits or revealing outfits.
Statistics show that profiles with clear, unobstructed facial photos receive more responses. Profiles with faces hidden by hats or dark glasses tend to raise suspicion—if someone doesn’t want to show themselves, they may be hiding something.
Studio photos are not recommended either, as people usually look different in everyday life than in professionally styled shoots with makeup.
If you naturally look like a magazine cover model, feel free to ignore this tip.
Otherwise, opt for natural photos or professionally taken shots at events rather than studio portraits.
2. Leaving Your Profile Blank
Who would you rather message: someone with an empty profile or someone who shares your favorite rock band? People tend to seek partners with similar interests. Increase your chances by filling out your profile.
It’s helpful to mention what you’re looking for in a partner or relationship, but avoid making it a list of demands or deal-breakers.
Don’t write a full biography—leave some mystery. Simply list your hobbies, interests, favorite movies and music, and whether you have children.
3. Sending Generic Opening Messages
Messages like “Hi beautiful! Let’s get to know each other!” are received by women dozens of times daily. Usually, they neither want nor have time to reply.
The solution is simple: pay attention to what the person has written about themselves. People spend hours completing their profiles, so do yourself a favor and read it. This saves time and helps you avoid unsuitable matches while crafting a personalized first message.
Many look for partners with shared hobbies and interests—use this to your advantage.
4. Spelling and Punctuation Mistakes
While some women might like "bad boys," poor grammar won’t earn you points. If you’re unsure about spelling, use tools to check your messages before sending.
Also, avoid excessive punctuation like multiple exclamation marks or ellipses. Overusing these often signals nervousness or insecurity and can be off-putting.
For example, a message like “Hi!!!!! How about meeting………calling!!!!! maybe we’ll like each other))))))” doesn’t leave a good impression.
5. Rushing or Delaying Real-Life Meetings
Inviting someone on a date immediately is usually not a good idea. If you like your conversation partner, ask for their phone number and suggest meeting after a few days of regular online communication.
On the other hand, don’t drag out messaging for weeks or months without moving forward.
Finding the ideal partner takes time—don’t waste it on unsuitable people.
6. Dishonesty on Your Profile
Many dating site users lie about themselves—some use photos from a decade ago to appear younger or slimmer.
If you plan to continue communication offline, always be truthful. Lies will eventually be uncovered, damaging your reputation and chances.
7. Harassing Users Who Don’t Respond
If someone doesn’t reply to your message, accept it and move on. No one owes you a response.
Don’t bombard users with messages or, worse, insults. This is a sure way to get blocked.
8. Interrogating Your Conversation Partner
Wanting to learn about someone is natural, but moderation is key. If your chat feels like a job interview, it’s time to change approach.
Not sure how to keep the conversation going? Prepare a list of topics or study their profile information.
Ask their opinion on a recent movie, book, or local event. Men often enjoy discussing hobbies, sports, politics, history, or work achievements. Women tend to open up about children, pets, events, and feelings.
These eight mistakes are among the most common on dating platforms. Pay attention to them and avoid these pitfalls to build a positive reputation as an engaging conversationalist.
*Note: Meta Platforms Inc. and its social networks Facebook and Instagram are restricted in certain regions.
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