Break Free from Toxic Positivity with Renowned Author Nora McInerny

Amy Morin, LCSW, is a licensed psychotherapist and internationally acclaimed author. Her acclaimed works, such as "13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do," have been translated into over 40 languages. Her TEDx talk, "The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong," ranks among the most popular presentations worldwide.

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On The Verywell Mind Podcast, Amy Morin, LCSW, engages with authors, experts, entrepreneurs, athletes, musicians, and other inspiring figures to explore the techniques that empower them to excel emotionally and mentally.

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Introducing Nora McInerny

Minneapolis-based author Nora McInerny courageously shares her journey through grief and loss. In 2014, she endured a miscarriage and the heartbreaking loss of both her husband and father within weeks.

Her husband’s obituary made headlines, as it was co-written during his final battle with cancer. Filled with humor—he depicted himself as Spider-Man and Gwen Stefani’s ex-husband—it resonated deeply, captivating millions.

The Mental Resilience of Nora McInerny

Since these profound losses, Nora has authored several books detailing her grief journey, maintaining a blend of humor and honesty. She emphasizes that laughter and sorrow often coexist.

Utilizing her platform, Nora raises awareness on challenging topics like trauma and grief, offering a truthful portrayal of emotional pain and hope for those facing similar struggles—without sugarcoating the reality.

Insights from the Episode

• The complex nature of grief
• Experiencing multiple, sometimes conflicting emotions simultaneously
• Unexpected ways trauma can manifest in daily life
• The pitfalls of toxic positivity
• Understanding digital self-harm
• Transforming negative self-talk
• Honoring the memory of loved ones
• Balancing hope with acceptance of life’s uncertainties

Understanding Toxic Positivity and Building Mental Strength

Nora encourages openly naming your emotions and embracing a spectrum of feelings, a practice supported by psychological research.

Studies indicate that simply acknowledging uncomfortable emotions—like stating, “I feel anxious right now”—can reduce their intensity.

Recognizing conflicting emotions helps clarify your inner experience, such as feeling both excitement and sadness about a new job or relationship.

Words of Wisdom from Nora

Nora McInerny

“We live in a culture that pressures us to perform happiness unnaturally. Yet, we become experts at faking it.”

— Nora McInerny

• “Allow yourself to hope as much as possible each day because this feeling won’t last forever. Also, permit yourself to feel sadness on tough days because that too is temporary.”
• “I share my inner thoughts so others can offer me honesty.”
• “Life will bring both beauty and terror. These experiences shape your story—you are not defined by a single mistake or event.”

About The Verywell Mind Podcast

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Additional Resources

• Purchase Nora's book "It’s Okay to Laugh (Crying Is Cool Too)"
• Purchase Nora's memoir "No Happy Endings"
• Purchase "The Hot Young Widows Club: Lessons on Survival From the Front Lines of Grief"
• Listen to Nora's podcast "Terrible, Thanks for Asking"
• Follow Nora on Instagram
• Follow Nora on Twitter
• Watch Nora's TED Talk

Read more:

• The Verywell Mind Podcast

By Amy Morin, LCSW
Amy Morin is a psychotherapist and bestselling author whose books, including "13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do," have reached readers in over 40 languages. Her TEDx talk, "The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong," is among the most viewed worldwide.

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