6 Common Misconceptions About Depression, Explained by a Therapist
As a therapist who personally experiences depression, I want to share six common misunderstandings about depression and what I truly wish people understood.
First and foremost, blaming yourself won’t improve your situation.
They say, “Write what you know,” and as a therapist, I also believe in “treating what you know.”
Living with depression daily, both as an individual and a therapist, I often find how easily depression is misunderstood. While I’m usually calm, oversimplifying depression is one thing that truly frustrates me.
From an outsider’s perspective, depression might seem like an exaggerated response to stress or even a reaction to nothing at all. Even when I’m feeling well, I sometimes struggle to comprehend how I once felt so deeply depressed over certain events.
My goal is to help others feel less isolated in their struggles. Whether it’s changing how you view a loved one’s depression or helping you feel recognized, here are six misconceptions about depression and what I wish people truly understood.
Depression Is a Continuous Struggle—Here’s What I’ve Learned
There’s “No Reason” to Be Depressed
Let’s stop using this phrase. I’ve heard it used to describe others’ depression and even used it myself. Blaming yourself—or others blaming you—doesn’t help.
Looking at my life, some might say I "have no reason to be depressed" (note the quotation marks). I’m privileged in many ways and generally enjoy my life. Still, my history of trauma and genetic factors mean that sometimes my brain simply lacks the capacity to combat stress, much like how our immune system can struggle against certain illnesses.
You Can Just “Snap Out of It”
Despite what social media might suggest, overcoming depression isn’t as simple as a quick fix. While some may find relief easily, most do not—and that’s not your fault. Just like you wouldn’t blame someone for having advanced cancer, the intensity of your depression isn’t your fault.
Depression exists on a spectrum, ranging from mild symptoms like low mood and fatigue to severe major depressive disorder that can impair daily functioning and may require hospitalization.
Telling someone with severe, suicidal depression to simply think positively is like trying to heal a bullet wound with a bandage.
While your intentions may be good, sharing one simple cure can make others feel misunderstood or ashamed.
Unless you’ve lived my exact experience, what worked for you probably won’t work for me—and vice versa.
Depression Doesn’t Have a “Look”
Depression isn’t limited to the stereotypical image of a gloomy teenager dressed in black. It can also affect vibrant, outgoing people—like me, often wearing bright colors. Depression might even be reflected in your own image.
A 2023 survey found nearly one in three people have been diagnosed with depression, so it’s likely someone close to you has experienced it.
While some with melancholic personalities may be more vulnerable, extroverted individuals also struggle with depression, often termed "smiling," high-functioning, or masked depression. These individuals are often the last people you’d expect.
When I first disclosed my depression nearly ten years ago, I was working full-time, training for marathons, volunteering, and maintaining an active social life. I laughed frequently and rarely had free evenings.
“I’m an extrovert!” I would have told you then. But inside, my thoughts were too dark to face alone, and my perfectionism prevented me from admitting my depression.
SSRIs and Talk Therapy Aren’t the Only Treatments
Thankfully, depression treatment is evolving. For decades, most medications were based on outdated theories from the 1950s and '60s.
Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) and talk therapy have been the primary accessible treatments but come with side effects and costs, respectively. Both can be effective.
Now, innovative options like ketamine therapy and transcranial magnetic stimulation are available, with over 2,000 clinical trials underway.
The FDA recently issued guidelines for clinical trials involving psychedelic medications, signaling potential approval in the near future.
Depression Impacts More Than Just Your Brain
Many say, “I’m not depressed!” because they don’t feel sad or hopeless.
Yet, symptoms like insomnia, appetite changes, unexplained weight loss, chronic pain, and daytime exhaustion can all be linked to depression. Remember, the brain is part of the body and influences overall health.
You Are Not Alone
Depression can make you feel isolated, like you’re fighting alone. However, this feeling is often a symptom of the illness itself. Those with major depressive disorder tend to blame themselves and withdraw to avoid shame.
With rising depression rates, it’s likely you know someone who has experienced it. Even if not openly shared, remember you’re only seeing their best moments.
If you or someone you care about is struggling, contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357 for support and treatment options.
For additional mental health resources, visit our National Helpline Database.
- Conditions A-Z
- Depression
Sources
- Gallup.com: U.S. Depression Rates Reach Record Highs
- FDA: Draft Guidance on Clinical Trials with Psychedelic Drugs
- Gandhi ATP. The Importance of Somatic Symptoms in Depression in Primary Care. Prim Care Companion CNS Disord. 2005;7(4). doi:10.4088/pcc.v07n0405
- Green S, Moll J, Deakin JFW, et al. Proneness to Decreased Negative Emotions in Major Depressive Disorder When Blaming Others Rather Than Oneself. Psychopathology. 2013;46(1):34-44.
By Theodora Blanchfield, AMFT
Theodora Blanchfield is an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist and mental health writer dedicated to helping others through her personal and professional experiences. She holds a master's degree in clinical psychology from Antioch University and serves on the board of Still I Run, a nonprofit promoting mental health awareness through running. Her work has appeared in Women’s Health, Bustle, Healthline, and she has been quoted in the New York Times, Shape, and Marie Claire.
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