How to Openly Discuss Period Sex with Your Partner
Discover the advantages of period sex, understand why it can be a sensitive topic, and learn effective ways to start the conversation with your partner.
Ariane Resnick, CNC, is a certified nutritionist, mental health writer, and wellness advocate promoting inclusivity and accessibility.
Open communication about sex is essential in any relationship. Honest and clear dialogue about sexual matters often leads to more satisfying intimacy, while poor communication can create emotional and relational challenges.
Yet, discussing sex can be uncomfortable for many. When it comes to period sex, the conversation might feel especially daunting.
Regardless of discomfort, in relationships where one partner menstruates, period sex is a topic that surfaces regularly. Although it offers numerous benefits, initiating this discussion can remain difficult.
Below, we explore the health perks of period sex, why it’s often hard to talk about, strategies for better communication, and practical tips to enhance the experience.
Health Advantages of Period Sex
Sex provides mental, emotional, and relational benefits, with added perks when shared during menstruation.
Relief from Menstrual Cramps and Enhanced Orgasms
Dr. Alyssa Dweck, an expert in sexual and reproductive health, explains to Verywell that orgasms during menstruation can ease cramps by releasing neurotransmitters like dopamine. She adds that orgasms may feel more intense and sexual desire can increase during this time.
The rhythmic contractions of vaginal muscles during orgasm can help reduce menstrual pain effectively.
Lower Chance of Pregnancy
Period sex generally carries a reduced risk of pregnancy. While conception is possible near the end of menstruation due to sperm longevity, it’s uncommon. Studies show only 6% of pregnancies result from sperm older than three days, typically outside the fertile window.
Stress Reduction and Better Sleep
Sex releases endorphins that promote well-being and alleviate stress. Given that menstruation can cause discomfort and disrupt sleep, sex during this time may improve mood and enhance rest.
Improved sleep quality supports mental clarity and emotional balance, making sex a beneficial activity during menstruation.
Challenges in Discussing Period Sex
Several factors contribute to the difficulty of addressing period sex openly. Here are three common reasons.
Stigma Around Menstruation
Period stigma, or "period shaming," involves negative attitudes and discrimination toward menstruators. Society often portrays menstruation as unclean or taboo, influencing personal discomfort despite progressive beliefs.
Dr. Dweck highlights that cultural, religious, and familial influences shape attitudes toward menstruation and contribute to shame.
Sensitivity of Personal Topics
Both sex and menstruation are intimate subjects that can evoke complex emotions. Combining these topics may increase apprehension, but with empathy and courage, such conversations are achievable.
Uncertainty About Your Partner’s Views
Often, partners may avoid discussing period sex due to uncertainty about each other’s feelings. This can lead to assumptions that period sex is undesirable or unclean, increasing hesitation to bring it up.
Scheduling around menstruation or declining sex during periods are common avoidance strategies.
Effective Ways to Discuss Period Sex with Your Partner
Understanding its benefits and challenges prepares you to approach the topic thoughtfully. Here’s how to start.
Be Clear and Honest
Dr. Dweck advises initiating the conversation directly. You might say, "I want to talk about something—how do you feel about having sex during my period?" or express your own interest openly.
This straightforward approach often leads to surprising openness and understanding.
Address Any Hesitations
Many people feel uneasy about the messiness or worry about causing pain during period sex. Preparing solutions to minimize mess and reassuring your partner can ease concerns.
Explaining that blood doesn’t mean harm is key to building comfort.
Initiating the Talk as a Non-Menstruating Partner
If you don’t menstruate but want to explore period sex, it’s perfectly acceptable to start the conversation respectfully. Affirm your attraction and comfort with the idea, and allow your partner space to consider it.
Respecting their boundaries and readiness is vital for a healthy relationship.
Responding to Your Partner’s Proposal
If your partner brings up period sex and you’re unsure, reflect on your feelings honestly. Share any discomfort or excitement, and ask for time if needed.
Discuss your needs openly, such as preferred positions or preparations like towels or wipes, to ensure comfort.
Practical Tips for Enjoying Period Sex
When both partners are ready, these suggestions can make period sex more enjoyable.
Use a Menstrual Disc
Menstrual discs collect blood internally, reducing mess and easing partner anxiety about bleeding. They hold more fluid than tampons and create a seal to prevent leaks.
Try Shower Sex or Protective Bedding
Sex in the shower allows easy cleanup, while placing dark towels or waterproof sheets on the bed can protect surfaces and reduce stress about mess.
Consider Birth Control Options to Skip Periods
If period sex isn’t comfortable or desired, hormonal birth control methods can suppress menstruation. However, menstruation is a natural sign of health and fertility and should only be skipped based on personal preference.
Final Thoughts from Verywell
Discussing period sex may feel challenging, but it opens doors to deeper emotional, physical, and relational benefits. Difficult conversations are opportunities for growth, fostering honesty, empathy, and closeness in your relationship.
Remember, communication is the foundation for a fulfilling intimate life.
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