How Cannabis Empowered Me to Embrace My Disability with Pride

Krystal Kavita Jagoo, a dedicated social worker committed to anti-oppressive practice, has contributed to academic institutions across Canada. Her insightful essay, “Inclusive Reproductive Justice,” appeared in the Reproductive Justice Briefing Book.

For many years, I encouraged clients and loved ones to explore cannabis as a natural remedy, especially when it eased their health struggles.

Yet, personally accepting cannabis was a gradual process, shaped by my South Asian upbringing and the pervasive drug war narratives I absorbed during childhood.

As someone living with disabilities including migraines, sleep disturbances, and back pain, I now recognize cannabis as a key element in my evolving sense of disability pride.

This realization struck me after I missed a phone interview for my first freelance writing opportunity, during a particularly intense cycle of migraines and sleepless nights. After sharing my frustration with a close friend and former colleague, she revisited her earlier suggestion to try cannabidiol (CBD).

Though not the first to recommend CBD, I had long hesitated, burdened by ingrained stigmas around “drugs” and concerns about cost.

Mia Mingus’ Concept of Access Intimacy

I can’t recall when I first encountered Mia Mingus’ powerful idea of access intimacy, but it has deeply shaped how I understand my place—and that of my loved ones—in a society that often marginalizes us.

Having experienced institutional failures where accessibility language is co-opted without meaningful action against ableism, I know firsthand how rarely access needs are truly met. Access intimacy provides a framework for the elusive feeling when someone genuinely understands your access requirements—a crucial aspect of my cannabis journey toward improved quality of life.

While my partner wasn’t the first to suggest cannabis for my sleep issues, he was the one who encouraged me to seriously consider it. I remember thinking that with a week off from my university job, it was the perfect chance to try edibles and become comfortable with cannabis use.

During that holiday season, local dispensaries were often out of stock on cannabis products, especially edibles. By the time supplies returned, financial worries made me hesitant to invest. Without firsthand experience of cannabis’ benefits for pain and sleep, exploring CBD was put on hold.

Missing that interview forced me to reflect on how much had changed since my initial conversation about CBD. No longer commuting long hours to a hostile workplace, I felt ready to explore this option.

Following my partner’s product recommendations, I carefully planned my CBD use, trusting his knowledge to help me balance functionality and relief during freelance work.

Confronting Internalized Ableism

Initially, I limited myself to CBD edibles, but soon realized they weren’t enough to manage the relentless migraine, sleep disruption, and back pain—especially with ongoing stress from systemic oppression triggering symptoms. Over the past three months, I’ve experimented with various cannabis products and found that a blend of CBD and THC offers the most effective relief.

Disability Pride: Embracing Strength Amid Challenges

This journey has made life feel less overwhelming, no longer dominated by the daily battle with chronic pain. In a conversation with a friend, I joked about how my grandparents might disapprove of my cannabis use. She laughed and then thoughtfully shared that, based on the love they had for me, they would want me to access any relief that helps me cope.

Sharing my story is important because, as a mental health therapist, I understand how shame can prevent people from exploring helpful resources for managing disabilities.

Despite facing white supremacist workplace harassment that pushed me out of multiple jobs, my ability to publish on marginalization issues allows me to help others challenge harmful biases.

Finding Empowerment Through Disability Pride

As a fat, brown, queer immigrant woman and settler on Turtle Island, I write for those often seen as disposable by the dominant culture—those who may find disability pride elusive, especially amid trauma and challenges accessing care.

I share these personal details because the personal is political, and true liberation requires sharing our insights on surviving oppression in our bodies.

Thanks to lived experience and constructive dismissal, I’m acutely aware of the many forces beyond my control. In this context, combining CBD and THC products is one of the few tools that help me maintain my critical mind within the body I inhabit.

Read more about living well and self-improvement:

• Living Well
• Self-Improvement

Source:

1. Valentine D. Shifting the Weight of Inaccessibility: Access Intimacy as a Critical Phenomenological Ethos. Critically Sick: New Phenomenologies of Illness, Madness, and Disability. 2020;3(2):76-94. doi:10.5399/pjcp.v3i2.9

By Krystal Jagoo
Krystal Kavita Jagoo is a social worker dedicated to anti-oppressive practice.

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